For His Glory

Round two!

Rodeo!

Deep breath!

Let’s go!

For starters, where do I begin? I’m not sure exactly how long it’s been since I have written, but the title of this one I have known since 6/11/23.

Before beginning, I’m going to pray! Not just out loud, in mind, but also written in blog. It’s something I feel led to do. — I’d rather go with the approach and direction of Jesus, than to try and do anything on my own. – Of myself I can do nothing, but with him I can do all things! (Philippians 4:13 reference)

Dear Father God in the name of The Lord Jesus Christ,

Father as I come before you, I pray almighty God for forgiveness of sins. I pray God that you would lighten my eyes to who you are, and how you are moving in my life, even when I can’t see the whole picture yet to be completed, let me see you work in the little things. Open my spiritual eyes to discernment, and my heart to you, your word and your spirit. Jesus take the lead in my life. Everything that I have is because of you, and everything that I am is because of you. My past, my future, my present, you know it all, and you see it all. Despite all my failures, setbacks, flaws, you still love me, and you relentlessly pursue me, even when I try to run, you run faster to my heart, shielding it from the unknown, and shielding it from hell. God, I pray use me more, I pray you use me boldly, and I pray you use me to build up your kingdom. I pray Jesus that you remove those that don’t need to be in my life, and those that do need to be in my life, I pray you open the door so they can walk thought. I know your timing is not my timing, so please my Lord, help me to be patient, while I wait, and help me to know that even though the whole puzzle isn’t together, you are a promise keeper, you cannot lie. Everything you said you would do, you are still going to do it, and everything you said you would fulfill, you are working to do so. You are not slack doing it. Blessed are those who believe and have not saw (John 20:29), help us to realize God, that all things work together for the good of those who are called according to your purpose (Romans 8:28); even the bad unexplainable, that too works for your glory. God save us from our sins and set us on that straight and narrow path. In Jesus name I pray. AMEN.

Now, here goes.

For those of you that follow my blogs, you know my story. I’m a recovered addict, who has been set free from the chains of addiction for almost seven years. I’ve suffered a lot over the years, but looking back through spiritual eyes, I see God’s hands all over it, even on the bad stuff, that isn’t God’s fault. (I know what you’re thinking, God can prevent things from happening) listen, not everything is God’s fault; but he will get the glory if you allow him to, he’ll take the bad and turn it for good. — Back to my story. God is good even if times aren’t.

Since recovering, Jesus has led me back to school, first was to be a CNA, (completion date 10/2021) and this time it’s to become a registered nurse. – I finished my first two semesters of general education courses with 3.5 or better: praise Jesus.

Onward.

As semester two came to an end, I knew I still had to push to get into the nursing program. I’m on a time limit, one can only take so many pre-requisites, and I’ve completed them all with the exception of micro-medical & that’s optional in or out of the nursing program, I plan to tackle it next semester: beginning this fall. —

Marching farther.

In order to get into the nursing program, I also have to take the ACT, and TEAS exam. I knew I needed to take at least one of these exams during my summer break, and the other one during my upcoming semester; I’m pushing to be in the nursing program in the Spring of 2024; and graduating in the fall/winter 2025.

With time winding up, I prayed, and talked to Jesus, and within my spirit, and I felt led tackle the ACT! – Continuing on towards my goal, I prayed and prayed and prayed, and reached out to find dates the exam would be given. I asked the Lord to make a way, and I prayed God, please just work it out, you are leading me into nursing Jesus, you know I need this. I can’t do it without you, God, I need you. The date and the venue were given, 6/11/23 @ JCHS. –Jesus, now I need you to prepare me. I’m not asking for a huge score, just enough to get into the nursing program. I can’t do it without you, but I trust i will do it with you.

6/11/23@8AM

I walk into the venue, drain my nervous kidneys, take a deep breath, and enter the classroom.

The class was small, actually only five people were scheduled that day, and we were all given assigned seats. Think high school, and kids being spaced out to prevent cheating.

As soon as I started towards my seat, I saw it! – Like a thud to my heart to jump start my pulse, screaming yooo hooo, look at me. I had to get a second glance.

I was sure of what I saw, but in my mind, I was like… Jesus, I need to see that again!

I asked to step out for a second prior to the test starting just to take a double look, but I know what I saw; I just wanted to see it again.

The name on the first chair was CHLOE—–

I’m not making this up.

Jesus showed up, and he showed me he was there in a language that only I would understand, with a sign that gave me peace.

I continued to pray through the exam; it was lengthy and extremely hard. During the exam, I could hear him telling me, go with this one, just trust me. I filled in every bubble, and left there knowing, I’m either going to pass it or this will prepare me to pass it next time.

That sign though, it was heaven sent. —

Inhale, exhale.

About a week later, I got the multiple choice back, and I passed with an 18. While I’ll never make it to space, I’m certain one day, I’ll be a nurse, working for Jesus.

Fast forward

While I face my future, knowing Jesus has big plans for me, I’m also facing another valley, I’m going head long into it, at a speed that can’t be stopped. On 6/30/23; I’ll be having surgery on my left ear, the tympanic membrane.

I’ve cried and cried and cried, I’ve been scared, and afraid. I’ve wondered why God, I don’t understand. Why I do I have to face this, while in reality, I hurt. There’s a mass that has to come out. I’ve witnessed Jesus take this mass from a cholesteatoma which was behind the ear drum, to a cyst that’s in the middle ear canal- But still, I have to undergo the surgery. I’m sure he is healing me, but this doesn’t feel good. I’ve wondered about every aspect, from the IV, to the droopy gas meds they give you prior to sedation, and the over the face mask of gas. I’ve wondered about recovery, and will they give me too much pain meds, I’ve considered telling the anesthesiologist not to give me any fuddy duddy drugs unless I ask for them. I’ve went around every scenario that is possible, even the part where I do not make it out. — Sounds crazy right? Maybe it is, but mentally I’m being shaken, while spiritually I’m being strengthened.

On the way to church this past Sunday, I was praying and talking to Jesus, and telling him, I just don’t get it, I don’t want to be afraid, but I can’t help it, that’s when I saw it. I saw a warrior, she was in the air, with a raised sword in her right hand and a shield in her left, there were flames of red, and amber all around her, underneath her was a solid rock, and in front of her a mighty dark blackish / maroon dragon, — This warrior, she is me, and that dragon is fear, and all of satans army. You see, he came knocking at me with everything the flesh could feel, steal, and take, but my Jesus, he came in and raised the bar. He has called me his, and I only answer to what he says to do, and I only want to do what he has called me to do, including slay this dragon, to my nemesis, you came to me with dagger of heart ache, fleshly emotions, adultery, fear, death, and suffocation in your hand, and I, I tell you I come to you in the name of the LORD.

6/30/23 is the day my Giant will fall- Fear you don’t own me, it’s time for you to go back to HELL. — HEAR ME ROAR. I refuse to be scared anymore!!!! God is not done with me; this is only the beginning.

Jesus, I pray for a double portion of Elijahs anointing. I’ve been beat down and battered to long, God raise me up to be your warrior, fierce, bold, gentle, loving and dedicated to the walk you have called me into. I raise your name up, I could care less if they know who I am, I just want them to know you. I want them to know what an awesome God you are, and how close you are to them, even when they pretend to not hear your voice, even when they act like you aren’t there in the midst of them, when they ignore the nudges you place within them like a child nudging at its daddy, you nudge them. God raise them up, raise them up Lord, lead them to be strong and mighty, like you have called them to be. Help them father to be mended of the pain you did not inflict, help them Father to give their heart back to you. God show them your love and show them your mercy. Jesus be near to them, as they walk that last mile out of the valley, they have been lost in for so many years. Help them to cry out all the tears, each time the band aid is ripped off, help them to seek comfort in you like Lazarus on your bosom. Jesus you are near, you are near. God, I praise you. –Lift me up, lift me up Lord. Lift them up, lift them up Lord. — Let them feel your peace and keep your angels around us all. Until you call us home on high, Lord, lead us to lead an army great and small, young and old to you lord. — For you are not slack concerning your promises. We are just impatient.

Deep breath, let it out some more.

I don’t want to sleep tonight, but I will, and I trust Jesus will help me.

I have another message for you–

God is near to you!!

I’m still praying. I’ll never stop.

I just got to breath, I want to listen to music and keep this night going forever, regardless even if I stayed awake until surgery time on Friday, I cannot stop the clock, I can however fight this with the sword of God, that everlasting word. —

Heaven and earth shall pass away, but his word will forever remain, (Mark 13:31 reference) we can’t be halfway in and halfway out. (Matthew 6:24 reference)

Another thing I saw, I’d like to share before I close.

While praying about my surgery, and meditating on Psalm 23, I saw a man holding lantern. My surroundings were dark, as though I was in that valley of the shadow of death, but this man, he had kept looking back motioning me forward. — Dawn was ahead.

YOUR DAWN IS COMING, are you preparing, or are you stuck in the waiting?

I’m a little mean. Grrrr.

I pray I’ve said something to help you,

Let’s pray this out.

Father God in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ,

Lord, I come to you, and I thank you for helping me write another blog. I thank you for the words you have given me to write, and I praise you for the valleys. I praise you for the opportunities to grow even when it hurts. Father, I thank you for sending Jesus to die for me, when I deserved to die instead of him. I thank you for loving me, even when I try to run from you, and I thank you for the souls you’ll touch. Father, I pray whosoever reads this, that you touch them Jesus, and you mend their hearts. I pray that you open their hearts to receive you back into it or simply into if they have never received you before. Jesus, I pray, for closure to those who are searching for closure, and I pray for peace for those who need peace. I pray that you lift them up, and set them on wings of eagles, so they can soar. I pray you give your angels charge over them in all their ways, so they can begin to work for you and your kingdom. I pray Jesus, not just for them, but for me also, God see me through the next few days, I rebuke any fear, and I stand on your infallible love for me. I know Jesus you have big plans for me, and I declare it over my life, my soul, and my mind! God flood my mind with your presence, and clear any rubbage that lingers of the enemy, you hold all power over me, my mind, my heart, and I am yours. Father, make your abode in me, and open thy word to me. Jesus let me life a life that mirrors you, and Lord, whatever thy will is, I accept it for my life. God, I thank you, for interrupting my plans and replacing them with your pathway to everlasting life. Though I fall short, you never fail to pick me up. I praise you forever, and ever, AMEN. Oh, and Jesus, let this message fall on good ground, if the ground isn’t good, plow it up and plant it deeper. — You’re holy and true, and its only you Jesus that has the power to save men from sin, destruction and hell. — All praise be to you, AMEN take 2.

You all have a blessed weekend.

If you need me message me.

christie7373@halfwayhomeministries.com

I love you forever, and Jesus loves you most, the extra mostest, ever!!! & Jesus, he himself is the best!

insert giggle.

❤ Christie.